How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
