I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
