i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
