Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
