is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
We have so much sex to catch up on
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Randomize
