once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
