That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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