In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
