Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I cockslap morals
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
