No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
