And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize
