when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize