Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize