jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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