That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
No subtext here. People are naked.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Ladies don't puke and tell
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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