the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
