Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
two words: eviction party
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
