16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
