I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Pants are for mortals
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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