I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
