i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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