I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
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