I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Randomize
