I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
