Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
