so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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