So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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