i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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