I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
