i don't like sucking hair
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize