Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
