she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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