You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
You were trust falling into bushes
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
