Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
He has the fingertips of a God
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