Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize