I love watching others lives come down to our level.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
