My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
