You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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