Already got asked if we're dating
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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