: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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