I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize