My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
