Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
