I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
