Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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