I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
