Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
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