Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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