idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
