i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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